The Last Day of 2009

Today is New Year's Eve - the last day of 2009. What a year! Everyone has been hit by the economic crunch in one way or another but have still been blessed.

Jenna and Weston moved into a new home last December and have been slowly painting and making it theirs. Gunnar turned 3 and Bailey turned 1. In a short while they will be having birthdays - Jenna's is in December; Weston and Bailey's are in January and Gunnar's is in February. They are expecting baby no. three in August.

Tad has been guiding mostly in New Mexico. He does all kinds of stuff to make a living, he's quite handy that way. He hopes to get on in the mines this coming year. He really liked his job down in Morenci.

Troy and Maggie moved to Gillette, Wyoming in November for a temporary job. I know that you have to do what you have to do to make a living, but I cried for days when they took Kamryn and Trentin so far away. I still miss them like crazy. Kamryn turned 3 in May and Trentin turned 1 in March. Troy had a birthday in December and it was he and Maggie's anniversary in December, too. Maggie's birthday was in September. I can hardly wait for them to get closer to home.

Loriel moved back to Tucson because it was so expensive to go to school in California. Adam is working out there so they go back and forth when they can. She does so well in school and is doing it all on her own.

I love being mo mo sadie to Gunnar and Kamryn; sadie to Bailey and mamaw to Trentin. Don't care what they call me, just love them so much it makes my heart hurt.

I had a good Christmas in the Valley with Weston and Jenna. It was fun to see the kids have Christmas - I've never done that before. I hated to have to come back home to an empty house - but somebody has to do it.

I hope for my family and friends a Happy New Year full of prosperity and peace and the blessings that only our Father in Heaven can give. Thank you for being you and being in my life.

Brrr...Baby's It's Cold Outside

Man the weather is something else...we're expecting the temperatures to drop even more through Tuesday and they even say we could get some snow. Friday night it was 12 degrees when Velda and I were coming home from Show Low. That morning everybody reported temperatures in town ranging from -6 to -2 below. Tad who NEVER gets cold even moved to the couch in front of the fire. He had the junk that was going around a couple of weeks ago, must have weakend him.

I've been trying to get ready for Christmas. I don't want Christmas this year. I want ALL of my babies home for Christmas, ALL of them. They will all spend Christmas either at home, in the badlands of Wyoming or hunting something. Ed offered to have me go to the Valley for Christmas. He said he would watch the dogs for me. Depends on how the month goes. I would like to spend Christmas with the grandkids. When I went out to get wood in I looked up and saw the star on Flat Top. I am so glad that the youth in our stake make the sacrifice to carry gas up the hill every night in December for us to have that glorious star! I loved that star when I was growing up and even more now.

Kamryn told me the other day, "Gramma, I come your house, THIS ISN'T FUN!" Made me laugh and cry at the same time. No it isn't fun sweetheart, but this will be good for all of us. How come that that doesn't kill us makes us stronger in so many ways?

I've been reflecting on the last year and it has been a really hard year for my family in many ways. The economy has affected all of the kids in different ways. Loriel was forced to come back to Arizona for school - it was just too expensive in California. Weston's work has been slow, but he is a hard worker. Tad still guides and fills in which gets him by, but that's about it and Troy and Maggie had to leave town for work. I hope that we each learn something from this, put it to use and are better prepared for the future.

I am grateful for all that I have. Grateful for the blessing of being a wife, mother and grandmother. Grateful for my health and the abilities that I still have. Grateful for this country, grateful for those who serve. I am grateful for the gospel and for our living Prophet and for those who serve with him. I am grateful to live in a small town, grateful for dear friends and family.

I hope that this holiday season brings blessings to each of you. Love to all.

Gratitude

Yesterday I went to the service for Cody Geisler, my third cousin on the Rogers side. His death is such a sad tragedy but his service was quite nice and was well-attended. I lost it and wept when the police escort left the auditorium parking lot with Chuck (Cody's dad) following them in his big truck and Cody's casket on the low boy. Hearing his air horn and knowing how hard this must be for a daddy to have to do, I just cried. My heart breaks for Dustie and for Chuck. I am so sad for Chelsea and for baby Cache. They have some long hard days ahead of them and the sad fact that his baby who isn't quite a year old won't remember his daddy. When we got to the Rogers Family Cemetary in Nutrioso, there were a lot of people there, too and the snow started coming in and it was cold and yet there was a good feeling around. I stood there looking at my dear family members who have lost loved ones that are buried there. My cousin Charlene had a still-born baby that is there. Sherry's son Shawn McCall is there. My baby, Damara is there. Homer's boys Kaelsy and Steven are there and now Cody. Sherry said, there are too many young ones here and I agreed. Don is there next to Damara; my Grandpa Rogers' brother Albert is there; my Grandma and Grandpa Rogers and Uncle Jimmy are there. My two Aunts, Lela and Marie are there. And time will bring other loved ones there and it made me sad. Of the blessings of the day, I was able to express my gratitude for the Gospel in my life and the hope that it gives me. I am grateful for the Plan of Salvation - the plan of happiness. I gained my testimony of it when I lost Damara. It became so real to me. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that we will see our loved ones again. We will be with them again. I am grateful for dear friends and family. To see my cousins yesterday (most of the uncles weren't at the graveside) made me realize just how much I love each one of them. To see good people I have known many years made me grateful to live in a small town. The Geislers are good people. Hank said that it is an honor to have a Geisler in the Rogers Family Cemetary. I agree. They are now family. I am grateful that many people have been so kind to Dustie and Chuck and their families.

I am blessed to live in this land of freedom and choice. I am blessed to have the restored Gospel in my life. I am blessed to be a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a sister, an aunt, a cousin, a neice, a granddaughter and hopefully a friend. To all of you - I am grateful for the piece of my heart you hold.

We Gather Together To Ask The Lord's Blessings...

On our dear family and friends on this Thanksgiving Day. Ed, Tad and I went to Nola's to eat today. It is so different not having all of the kids around. Had a wonderful meal, ate waaaaay too much and am blessed.

Jenna and Weston were coming up last night but their truck broke down and they had to literally limp back home and got there at 1:30 this morning. I was disappointed they couldn't make it up here but am thankful they got home safely.

Tad spent the morning meeting with his hunters and target practising as he will guide an elk hunt tomorrow. He had a good time scouting with Gunnar Hubbard this morning.

Maggie and Troy are having Thanksgiving with Kris and Leighann (sp). It will be different for Maggie too, her first time of not having Thanksgiving with some of her family. I miss them, miss the babies. When I talk to Kamryn, we usually both cry. She wants me to fly in an airplane to see her.

Tomorrow is black Friday for shoppers. Red Friday for those of us with no $$ - so what's new? I don't even have a clue what to do for everyone for Christmas and today I'm not even worried about it.

I hope that everyone has a nice Thanksgiving. I am thankful for all that I have and it is nice to kick back and think about my many blessings.

Love to all.

Ripped My Heart Right Out...

Troy got the call he's been waiting for yesterday...a job. Yes, that's great. But they want him to work in Gillette, Wyoming on Thursday morning. He says yes and then begins the process of packing up their house, their clothes and their kids and heading out for Wyoming today. He's so grateful and excited for his job and while it may last as long as 4 months, that means that they took my two babies and left for Wyoming (ten million freakin' miles away for 4 MONTHS) and all I can do is cry. When I passed them coming from my house today, I turned around and followed them to the Short Stop and leaned in the back seat. Kamryn said, "grandma, we're going on a trip" and I said "I know" and broke into tears. It wasn't long before my little sweetheart was fighting tears and then crying with me. Trentin didn't know what was going on and came over and loved on me too. Man, they just ripped my heart right out. I will miss them because I see them just about every day, some days three or four times a day and now nothing for 4 Freakin' months. I will be calling but I won't be holding.

Last night Kamryn cornered Tad when he came in and started chatting and followed him down the hall. I could hear her talking his leg off and then it got quiet and I went to see what was going on and they were laying in bed watching tv. Checking back a little later, they were snuggled up in bed, both sound asleep and I wanted to cry because I knew she didn't have a clue what was gonna be happening to her little world. Sweet memories of the two of them.

I know this is a good thing, it will be good for Troy and Maggie to be away from here and be on their own together. It is hard to make a living here and in these hard times, you have to do what you have to do to make a living. I get that - I don't get the taking the kids so damned far away from home.

This post is about Kamryn and Trentin and my love for them and how much I'm gonna miss them. This may seem like I have two favorites, which I DO NOT. It's just that I've never gone more than a few days not seeing them and for a mo mo sadie this is something I've never experienced...not having any grandkids in town and this is gonna be a killer.

I'll miss Maggie popping in - I'll miss Troy. I wish them well. I love all of them, but tonight I know that I won't see them tomorrow or the next day...and I am sad.

I love being a grandma. I love talking to Jenna on the phone and having her tell Gunnar (who WON'T talk on the phone) and Bailey Boo that mo mo sadie loves them and then hearing their response. I see them sometimes every month, most times every other month. I love them and love keeping up with their lives. I have a new experience, watching Kamryn and Trentin grow long-distance.

Babies...all four of you, mo mo sadie loves you with all of her heart. I love you "a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck".

Holy Crap It's Almost Thankgsiving

Where in the heck did August,

September

and October go?

It is now the middle of November - Thanksgiving is NEXT week, I can't believe it. It has been a busy time for me for some reason and I am so far behind that I might never get caught up.

I finally tackled (with Troy and Maggie's help) the garage, the woodpile and the little bedroom. The garage and the woodpile are great. The little bedroom will be great once I get everything put in its place. Kamryn thinks it is neat to have her own room at grandma's, complete with a tv.

Troy and Maggie are leaving in the morning for Wyoming. He has a temporary job there and they are all going. I am so sad. I don't know what I will do not being able to see Kamryn and Trentin, especially during the holidays. I know they need the work and I know it will be good for them, but being selfish, I can't stand it that they are taking the kids away from here.

I've had a housefull for the last three weeks. Velda and Tristan have been staying with me and I think they are almost settled in their rental. Ed and Tad came and went and Grandma Mary was here, too. It's amazing how you can make sleeping arrangements work in a little house when you need to. I just wish my rooms were a little bigger to make it more comfortable for everyone, but you know what, we were all fine and we had what we need.

The cold for the last couple of days hasn't been too fun. I for one, have enjoyed our awesome fall. I dread the cold coming and staying. I hope we get the snow we need for a great spring and summer.

Hope all is well with all of you - Happy Thanksgiving to all.

PS...Kamryn followed me into the laundry room the other day and said, "grandma, what's that smell? I turned to look at her and asked "what smell" and I caught her saying "the one that smells like a skump". I cracked up. If I hadn't been looking at her I would have thought she was saying "skunk" but she was saying "skump". Trentin calls me mahmaw - oh I'm gonna miss these babies.

Happy 57

Yesterday would have been Don's 57th birthday. I thought about him all day long and how much we miss him and how much he is missing out on. He would have been the best grandpa ever - I would have come in as a distant second as a favorite if he were still here. It's been a long thirteen years in some ways and overnight in others. The twists and turns of life have been interesting, challenging, heartbreaking, joyful, wonderful, educational...I'm sorry he wasn't here to share the journey with us.

I've posted many times about him, so this will be short - I just wanted to say happy birthday, we love you, we miss you.