I hate Mother's Day! Of course when you are younger, you always serve in Primary and the first class I taught was the 5 year olds. I loved those kids and still do. Well after getting married and not having a baby by the second Mother's Day, I hated going to church, you know all of those sweet little kids singing "Mother I Love You"... it took almost 5 years before we had Damara and then she passed away at four days. I was devistated and then we were married almost 7 years when Jenna was born...boom, boom, boom four babies in a little less than 5 years. Raising Jenna, Tad and Maggie was a joy, and I was so busy with them I didn't realize I hate Mother's Day. Now that I'm older, I can shout out loud, I hate Mother's Day. Who in the hell had the idea to celebrate mothers? I LOVE my mother. I just feel so bad that I don't measure up. My mother is kind and patient. My mother is a good shot (ask Lynn...she can chuck a rock and nail you when she needs to) and with Lynn there was more than one time he needed it. My mother never thought twice about warming up your behind if you needed it (I am pleased to say it didn't take me near as long to figure things out and stay out of trouble as it did my brother, Lynn) That kid must have gotten a spanking a day :o( and he never got one he didn't deserve and probably didn't get as many as he should have. Any way, back to mom. She has been there for me for everything I've ever needed. She used to sew all of my clothes, give me the Toni home permanents (before "Annie" made kinky cute) and is a super cook. My mother has worked hard with my dad for 56 years and I can call her for something and if it's in her power to do it, it is done. Nola is like that too. Why aren't I?
I failed in so many things as a mother that having a whole day to celebrate my failures isn't a fun thing to do. So today, I went to church, had a ball in Primary, came home and listened to Tad play the guitar, rocked out with Nickelback and then went to Nola's for dinner. Had a great time and celebrated my mother. I love her for all she has done for me. As I get older and she is aging and getting frail in some ways, I see my great grandmother and grandmother in her and it tugs at my heart strings. I know one of these days my mother will be gone and that will be one of the saddest days of my life. For now, I can call her, drop in and visit her, take her for a coke or just know she's there. I am so grateful for my mom. I am grateful for my family and for my kids. They are the joy of my life and I hope that they know that my failures and screw ups weren't intentional, just me trying to do the best that I could with what I had.
Hope all of you had a good day.
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